Roads Taken

You see there was a time in my life that people were completely the enemy, though I haven't completely gotten past that entirely, I have come to the realization, not all humanity is as evil as I had expected. No, just most of them. I did have a group of friends that I liked, but I kept to them, and them alone. Luckily I was next to other people in classes who turned out to be quite charming. You see, the female race, though something that I have come to see in better light as of late, has typically never treated me pleasantly. 

What do I mean by this? I was of a low social stature in the good old days of high school. I was that quiet kid who always wore a hoodie and jeans, even in ninety degree weather, (I still wear a similar style even now, and I plan to continue, because I'm awesome). I knew that wearing that would not up my social stature, but it wouldn't lower it, so why not be comfortable in the way I choose, right?

Back to it. So this girl ended up being incredibly kind, and I actually made a friend. And unlike earlier years, she wasn't just being my friend to get good grades in math, no that would have been a bad idea with my math record that year.

 You see that all goes back to my eighth grade Algebra 1 class. Every since that forsaken class, my grades in math went slowly down the slope of unhappiness. My Teacher, Mrs. Terrible (not a real name), told me from the first week that she didn't think I could make it. Now all of my life up until that point I had been the Stephen Hawking of the kids in my grade (prideful? yeah, truthful? somewhat). Now the teacher was telling me I couldn't make it? You might as well hang a demotivational in the room that says, failure achieved. In middle school we were given 1 period of the day to sign up for fun activities to drain our energetic selves, we were children we needed it. Well this teacher made me sign up for her stupid study hall in order to work on my math skills. Instead of helping me, she told me to sit in the corner desk and practice on my own. That following summer I taught myself Algebra 1, but in a way that made sense to me, but apparently the rest of the world can not understand my method of calculation. Resulting in not the best grades.

So the fun class of math. This teacher was a nice person, but his teaching style was...not efficient. Considering a majority of the class did poorly, I think that my conclusion was correct. But luckily I had a friend. In the first week, it was basically just silence, just an exchange of names, that was as far as I ever got with a stranger, I mean strangers are strange. But due to her excessive kindness, or knowledge that she would be stuck next to me all year resulted in her slowly beginning conversations for me. I have to admit, I was kind of freaked out, and I was hoping for silence. But it turns out she had a sense of humor, one quite similar to mine. 

Within a few months our conversations had moved from a simple hello and how are you, the formalities, to a joke, an eye roll about the current mathematical issues that was presented. It then went from there to hobbies, and interests. A topic I had not touched with anyone that I was unfamiliar with. It was something new. I even stupidly began spouting off Nerdiness, which to my surprise was not taken in the usual way. Like Halo for example, I would not stop going on about it. It was kind of a big thing.

You see back when Halo 3 was the big new game (and beyond that) I used to play Halo excessively. This one summer I obtained x box live and thus ended my life. I played that game from morning until dusk. I bought all the books, read them with great zeal, and read them again and again. I even bought action figures. On a regular day, I played the xbox from 8am until 12am, with maybe two or three hour breaks in between. I was quite into the game. It became my life, so much so that I put my health in jeopardy. I ended up losing somewhere around fifty pounds. The Doctors all thought I was dying, and ran tests. It was quite hilarious. But anyways, yes so Halo became a portion of my being.

Despite my over discussion of Halo, this girl was able to handle my company to the point where she was able to share personal facts. In fact she asked for my advice on things. Now being as stupid as I was, I didn't know how to help the situation well, and I tried my best, but she respected that I tried. With the end of the year rolling around, I realized just how important this person had become to me in my life. What they had done created a milestone, a complete upheaval of everything I had been. I wished I had continued contact, as friends, but in my fear I failed to make a lasting connecting. But maybe it was for the better. In the end, my life was ultimately improved because of that math class. I can now talk to more people, I have gain a small bit of confidence that lead to the rise in understanding that I have. 

I wish I could find that person and than them for all they've done, but in the end they would probably not understand what all they did. I didn't, but here I am looking back and realizing the significance. But I guess that's life. At the time, I thought nothing of it, but it became an important part of me.

Life comes at you sideways, when you're not looking. It throws a fastball at your face as you're rounding a corner. You always seem to notice those events, because they are a crisis, and stand out. But sometimes, the moments, the most important events of your life are the walk up to the fast ball. They are the moments leading up to the turning of the corner. Because as we look back in hindsight, those fast balls, those life changing events, were only the paths we took coming to a single point. 

The big moments are what seems most important, but it's the roads taken that lead us there. When you're traveling through life, try to stop and look, because sometimes knowing where you're going is enough to give you the hope and drive to continue.